Crossfit and Lulus

To add to my list of “I am nots”… I’m going to add fashionista.  My mother has dressed me up until three years ago (hmmm, once I started crossfit… coincidence?!!??!)!

I went on a run a few years ago with my BFF Erica and we were discussing running clothes.  I ran in the same pants for every run and she basically wanted to know why.  I explained to her that I had a pooch that didn’t feel good to run with.  I told her that a baggy tshirt and the long black yoga pants were comfortable.  With pure sweetness in her heart and her voice she mentioned “looking the part”.

I have tried “running shorts” on before but feel like they cut my muffin top off right in the middle making the problem worse.  One word: chaffing.  Plus, I have been genetically blessed with cellulite.  Running shorts and I are not friends.

Then I found biking shorts.  The were spandexy, secured my pooch and covered most of the cellulite.

Then I went to crossfit.  Remember crossfit does everything the “crossfit way”… that goes with fashion too!  Crossfit girls have legs.  Not Comso legs- crossfit girls have thick, strong legs and right above these dynamite stems are what Sir Mix A Lot would let ride in his Mercedes!


The crossfit girls wear these little booty shorts called LuluLemons.  No, it’s not French.  But, apparently they do a bang up job securing the “pooch”.  When I was in Dallas for the CFKs course I went to a Lulu Lemons store.  An hour later, I walked out with my first pair of lulus.

I havent warn them yet… but I’m getting closer.  Today I wore a pair of short shorts– not quite lulu short, but short for me.  Yes, I still have cellulite.  But I felt good in my short shorts.  Before I left the house I checked myself in the mirror and thought, “should I wear these?”  Then I tried to think of the worst thing that could happen: the girls I wod with might go to coffee and laugh and that the audacity I had wearing them short shorts.

So what.  So they talk.

Augusten is an authro and has a beard.  He's legit.

Augusten is an author and has a beard. He’s legit.<- for susan and melissa.

Then came the wod:

1RM for the snatch… then a 12min AMRAP

  • 10 16kg kettlebell swings
  • 10 hand release pushups (like a regular pushup, but crossfits version)
  • 10 toes to bar

When we started going through the snatch warm up, the coaches used the cue: “bump the bar off your fupa!!!!!!!!”  It was an amazing moment.  You could actually hear the blinking.

After the wod I chin wagged with a few of the girls… one of them said they liked my shorts.  I ran her voice through my internal snarky detector.  No snarky detected.


PRing the snatch off of my “pooch” in my short shorts… I’ll take it!



1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Zan
    Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:17:55

    YES!! I will tell you right now that you have taken what you learned from Erica and passed it on! When I started running, you bought be an outfit and told me to “look the part”! I recently had to get rid of those pants because they fall down when I run. Did you hear me? They fall down. 😀 You are an inspiration and I read your posts for motivation. Rock your short shorts girl, I am right behind you! ❤


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