The Whole 30 SUCKS

I’m almost three weeks in and I’m way over this.  The last few days have been hell.  My mouth waters when I see something sweet, carby or laced with GMOs that my jaw actually hurts.  HURTS!!!!

get in my belly!

get in my belly!

Week one sucked.  Week two I was on a protein high.  And week three has just sucked.  It could be any of the following: my monthly visitor, the death of a PJ, Boston, Waco, being stood up for coffee, being stood up for lunch, or having to go to a stupid 80s party…. but really, I want to blame the food.

The food that I have been eating has been good, don’t get me wrong, but it comes with an hour of creating a grocery list, a 1/2 hour at the commissary, a 1/2 hour at the gate three market, putting the groceries away, pulling them back out, prepping, chopping, sautéing, browning, processing, shredding, juillenning, steaming, crockpotting, serving, eating, tuperwaring and then to top off the day…. cleaning (ok, ok, my husband does most of the cleaning).  You get the idea.

It is exhausting. 

Since I’m in such a bright and cheery mood, lets talk about: snacks after a kids game.  I think its stupid.  We shouldn’t reward our kids with crap food.  Its dumb, really.

What happened to the days (ugh, those damn 80’s) when a parent brought sliced oranges?  I’ll tell you what happened.

  • scenario 1: A mom wanted to one-up the other moms: Look what so and sos mom brought- fresh doughnuts… yay!!!!
  • scenario 2: A mom was too “busy” to cut up five oranges and put them in a bowl.  Buying capri suns and a bag of chips is “easier”.

Thanks lady.  Now I’ve been wracking my brain for three weeks dreading the “snack” game.  Last week it was JRs turn.  I was still on my protein high and was damned and determined to make it a “healthy” snack.  I packed a 100% juice box, cut up oranges and two Easter Reeces Peanut Butter Eggs.  Yup.  I failed. 

For MC I was going to make plantain chips, a Tupperware of guacamole, a water and sliced oranges.  I didn’t.  I made trail-mix (almonds, pecans, coconut flakes & raspberry M&Ms), a tangerine, a G2 Gatorade and Peanut Butter Cup.  Fail- I know.

I’ll tell you why: I’m not ready to be that Mom. 

I’m this Mom: CLICK HERE

Ok, now that we all are laughing… food:


“ripe” plantains

  • Slice the ends off.
  • Then slice longish. 
  • Then peel. 
  • Then fry in coconut oil.

    Looks like fried bananas.

    Looks like fried bananas.

    I went with everdaypaleo.coms recipe for the fried plantains.  Out of 7 plantains that I fried… maybe three “chips” were crispy.  The others were soft and tasted like fried bananas (which is good-by the way).  Makes it tough to “dip” into guac… but it was overall it was pretty darn good meal!!!

    taco salad, plantain chips and guac

    taco salad, plantain chips and guac


Tonight is an 80’s party.  I hate the 80’s.  Seven gin and tonics would really make the night go better.  And I really want to throw in the towl and go back to my Monday through Friday paleo living.  But, really, what’s 10 more days?



3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Jake
    Apr 20, 2013 @ 12:27:28

    Hey Jess! Stay with it.

    Good article on the powers of cooking.

    Have some good sushi for me. Tell Chris, Marvin Sessions says hello.

    Best to you and your family,


  2. Priscilla Torres
    Apr 22, 2013 @ 22:08:25

    Luv your blog! And I was just thinking about you and the Whole 30 last week and was going to ask how it was going. I was “thinking” about doing it……I dunno now :O But YOU got this! You’re almost done, stick with it 😉


  3. Trackback: Whole 30 KISSed goodbye | pacificallypaleo

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